
Funny Things to Say to a TSA Agent While…
- Would you prefer I said that this was a lethal explosive or that I was just happy to see you?
- I’ve got some baggage in my pants that’s been left unattended.
- Do you know what censure means? Yeah, me neither.
- If you were a member of the Nixon family, you’d be Pat. You know, because of the pats.
- If you were an 80’s-era female singer, you’d be Pat Benatar. You know, because of the pats.
- If you were a member of the Jackson family, you’d be Michael. You know, because of the…
- Have you ever seen “The Crying Game”?
- You’d think if they were going to make this required, they would at least legalize smoking on board airplanes afterwards.
- So, do you come here often?
- Is this a bad time to tell you I have this rare condition where if anyone touches a specific dime-sized area of my upper thigh I make the bond with him for life? I’m part Avatar on my mother’s side.
- If you touch my junk, I will have you arrested
- Hey can you check me for a hernia while your down there!
- Dude a little to the left
- Am a quart low or am I good for another couple hundred miles.
- Could you give me a rotation and balance after you finish the oil change?
- I feel like a couch and your the person looking for change.
- So you want to get some drinks later?
- Watch out for the python it’ll get ya!
- You know, what you’re doing makes us legally married in some states!
- Careful around the open sores!
- I’ll give you half an hour to stop that!
Add your own in the comments. 🙂
by Will Burns
56 COMMENTS
I knew you were gay, but come on!
you can walk up to them hold out your arms and before they start say touch me baby i like it.
brings back memories of being an alter boy
exactly. if they arent really going to say it then dont act like you’re going to. and its not the securities fault that it is their job to do this. maybe you should learn what you’re talking about. aqnd dont tell me to lighten up. dueces.
-Never got to second base in an airport. Thanks.
-You’re doing it wrong.
-Never got to second base in an airport. Thanks.
-You’re doing it wrong.